Funny One Liners

Chau sent me these last night via email….very funny but not politically correct (hmmmm, that is what makes them so funny!)  Just like Congress!  :-))))

Enjoy!

I asked my new girlfriend what sort of books she’s interested in, she said:

Check Books

Q: What is the difference between men and pigs?

A: Pigs don’t turn into men when they drink.

Definition of a Nurse:

A beautiful woman who holds your hand for one full minute and then expects your pulse to be normal.

Q: Why dogs don’t marry?

A: Because they are already leading a dog’s life!

Q: What’s the difference between mother & wife?

A: One woman brings you into the world crying & the other ensures you continue to do so.

Q: A blonde enters kitchen, opens sugar container, looks inside and closes it.  She does this again and again. Why?


A: Because her Doctor told her to check her sugar levels regularly.

Q: What’s the difference between a good secretary and a personal secretary?


One says “Good morning, boss”.  The other says “It’s morning, boss.”

Drive Safe!  Never Forget.

 

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